Chapter 1

William Mackenzie pinched the bridge of his nose tiredly, his eyes shut in frustration. He already had a headache and the day had just barely begun. The second and third elders had hijacked the meeting that morning and now instead of reviewing the recovery rate of the villages which had been ravaged by a war with the neighboring clan three years ago, they were berating him over trivial matters.

The war had been a short one, incited by a betrayal which had rocked the clan, but it had been ended thanks to the efforts of those closest to him. It had been his main focus since then to rehabilitate the villages affected as well as make sure nothing like that could happen again. He had succeeded in making his lands more secure, but it was not easy to take care of victims of war. Most men in those villages had died and the women and children left were scarred. It was not about just feeding and clothing and sheltering those survivors, it was about getting those villages to run autonomously again.

To him it was more important to hear the latest news on how those villages were doing, but the elders were more concerned about the fact that he was now twenty-nine-years-old and had yet to find a wife and produce an heir. He was only one year away from officially becoming an old bachelor, they lamented. Anymore, and he would end up being ten years older than the women of marriageable age. Then it would be even harder to find a bride as they would wonder if something was wrong with him. It was a different thing if he were to be single at that age after being married once, but no one had ever seen him with a woman before.

In fact, the closest he had ever been to being married was an engagement which was cancelled before it was even publicly announced. The woman in question was now the wife of his best friend and General: Alastair Bain. She maintained a platonic relationship with him as he had never been romantically interested in her at all and was content being considered an uncle to her children. Since then, William had not even entertained the thought of another engagement. The only reason he had accepted the one with Jane at first was because the council had pressured him with the overwhelming opportunities marrying her would bring the clan. Due to that, he was willing to overlook his broken heart and enter a marriage solely for convenience. Since it did not work, he had lost interest.

Perhaps, it was due to their recent complaints that he had dreamt of that old memory which he tried to bury… the last night he spent with the love of his life seven years ago. A painful memory which he had done his best to bury for the sake of his own sanity. If he was being honest, he had woken up with a headache solely because of that. The continued talks of his marriage only served to make his head pound harder. He wondered if they thought he had not tried to find a woman to love. He had tried, and failed, thus giving up.

“Who would believe that despite choosin’ yer subordinate over ye, and cancelin’ yer engagement, the Englishwoman lives in this castle along with her children sired for another man?” the third elder, Filian Greshen, a rotund old man with a quivering mustache said. William was aware that they had been stewing over this fact for quite a while, but this was the first time any of them had said so out loud. The resounding response was deafening as all the elders agreed, having wanted to mention it themselves. They could only be like this now because Alastair was not there. William held back a groan.

If I had ken this would happen, I would nae have allowed Alastair to visit his cabin this week.

“Indeed, it would baffle anyone who heard it. How many men would allow it? If only for their broken pride they would want the woman and her chosen man far away from their sights usin’ one excuse or the other. Our Laird however does nae even consider such things. Of course, we are grateful for the dedication to the people and the overwhelmin’ care for the clan, but those things are nae all, me Laird. The Laird is too straightforward, and this makes him bad for politics as well. That is why until now only Cargill and Balfour are our allied clans and the rest can nae reach an agreement with us,” the second elder, Angus Lewis, added in complaint.

“Enough,” William said before they could go too far. “Have ye forgotten that the woman ye speak of is the wife of General Bain? Dae I need to remind ye of her contributions to the war three years ago?”
At his words, they grumbled, but could not say anything as the defeat of the enemy was largely due to Jane and her father John Baxendale who had brought the English soldiers under his command to help subdue the enemy. Jane herself had been pivotal to their success as despite being a woman, she had helped him kill the traitor as well as personally killed an escaping enemy to stop him from alerting the main army of their attack plan.

“While I dae nae particularly agree with everythin’ the second and third elder have said, I dae agree that ye must wed, me Laird,” the first elder said, speaking up for the first time since the meeting began. Immediately, all heads turned to him. Robert Mackenzie was the first elder and William’s uncle, making him the most important elder whose words were listened to.

“I ken that ye are nae interested in havin’ a political marriage, but the clan can nae be left without an heir. This is a duty the Laird must fulfill, so ye can nae continue to avoid it as this is detrimental to yer. In the worst-case scenario, ye would have to give up the Lairdship to me son, Lachlan as he is next in line after ye. Yer cousin is married, and his wife is with their third child. I urge ye to choose a bride before the year ends in order to avoid this council taking such extreme measures. I am sure the rest of the elders agree,” Robert said.

The elders murmured to each other, and, while they all were careful with their words unlike his uncle, they largely agreed with what he had said. Robert Mackenzie was a stern man. William knew him well enough that he was sure his uncle could never have any bad thoughts towards him, but the fact that his uncle meant well did not mean he was not stern. He was the only one who would bring up an ultimatum for William without fear as long as he believed it was something the clan needed. His cousin Lachlan on the other hand, he was not so sure about since they were not close. Lachlan had left the Highlands for a while, returning with his wife and had been staying in his father’s household since. William had not seen him in years. He could not confidently say whether or not his cousin would be a good Laird. He wondered if his cousin actually held such ambitions or if it was only something his uncle had come up with out of necessity.

In truth, if he was ever forced to bequeath his position to someone else, William would choose to give it to Alastair and his family. They were the closest to him and he could vouch for Alastair’s qualities as a good leader. His friend was his right-hand man, after all. He also loved his friend’s children as though they were his own. He trusted that they would be raised well enough to continue the Lairdship without issue.
“Rather than Lachlan who we have nae seen in so long, I believe the best person to be Laird after me would be General Bain,” he said, voicing his thoughts despite knowing that the council would be in uproar.

He winced slightly as they all yelled their objection in unison, nearly deafening him. His uncle who should have been the most offended was the only one who did not react, continuing to regard him with a serious expression that did not waver.

“Dae nae speak so lightly of giving the Lairdship to another bloodline, me Laird. Ye are a bit older than most, but there are nae many who rival ye when it comes to looks. If ye put in a bit of effort, even the younger ladies willnae let ye go,” his uncle said.

The particular choice of words made him frown deeply. He had been promised that he would never be let go of before. He knew very well how that ended. Suddenly annoyed, he brushed his hand over his face to keep his composure. His headache was already at horrible levels, it was best to let the topic go before it went any further.

To others it might seem a bit strange for him to be considering leaving his position just because he did not want to marry for the sake of an heir. However, marriage and love were important to him. In the first place, his father had been the same. His father who loved his mother dearly, lived without a wife for the rest of his life after William’s mother died giving birth to him. One of the things that his father had hammered into him was how important it was to marry for love and have a family full of love. His father believed that what made a true man was his ability to be gentle towards those he loved and terrifying to his enemies. A man was a failure if his family feared him.

“I will consider the thought of marriage again, elders,” he said, compromising for the sake of the meting finally moving on to more important topics. He would have to discuss this headache with Alastair once his friend returned.

….

Devona Bain made her way to through the grassy plains with nostalgia tugging at her heart. The spread of endless green that seemed to kiss the mountains on the horizon and the smell of the freshwater creek that she knew was nearby even without seeing it. It had been seven years since she had last seen the Highland plains… it was reason enough to be emotional. She had crossed the sea twice and survived, yet there was nothing more marvelous to her than being back on her home soil. As the warm breeze blew past her, ruffling her hair, she smiled wistfully. He had been right after all… she missed her home.

A year ago, Devona had become a widow as far as the public knew. Having lived with her ex-husband for so long, managing his estate and being his greatest companion in his old age, Devona was shocked when Pierre Louis confessed to the fact that his household was ruined and said that his final wish was that she run away before she was indicted for being his wife and that she returned to her motherland. He had broken the news to her in tears as she sat by his bed, with the mansion loud with silence in the absence of all the workers who had already abandoned them, taking what they could get their hands on from the mansion to sell. As they had not received their wages in a while, they were vengeful, and if it were possible, they would have stolen the walls of the building as well.

Despite the fact that she was suddenly put in a precarious position where she needed to tuck tail and escape the country, she could not help but weep from the bottom of her heart for Pierre. While to the public he was her husband, to her he was a second father. He had taken her in at the worst point in her life and given her everything, taking nothing in return. She had thought that perhaps he wanted a young woman to warm his bed in the last years of his life, but that was not the case at all. Pierre was just lonely, as he had lost his family long ago. Devona had been the last companion of his life.

He had surprised her with the news that Paris could no longer be her home, as he had invested in some shady business and ended up scammed. He thought that he would be able to handle the aftermath and did not tell her in case she worried, but death came for him too soon.
It was only when she felt tears on her cheek that she realized she had been crying. It was so typical of Pierre to think of her even when he was on his last breath. Instead of lamenting how he lost everything he had built all his life, he was advising her to take the last valuable thing she could find in his mansion and sell it to enable her escape before those he lent money from could catch her.

I know that if I do not say anything, you would continue to live here and take responsibility for all I leave behind. However, I cannot let you do that… You are still young with so much of your life to live… do not let yourself be tied down by a false sense of responsibility. I love you too much to say nothing, I believe you should return to your home. I see how you stare into the distance when you think no one is watching, and I see the tears you hide, proof that nothing I could give you would replace what you long for. That is why my dear Devona, my last wish is that you return home and find what you lost.

Devona wiped her cheek and laughed softly into the wind. After Pierre passed, she had run away after selling all they had left to pay their way onto the ship leaving for England and enough for the wagon bringing them to the Highlands. If it were not for the circumstances, she would have never been able to bring herself to return. She had left with the mind to never return, not even allowing herself to admit how much she missed what she had abandoned. Now here she was, her emotions a mess just because of a little breeze. She had arrived in the clan few days ago, but it had taken her exactly that long to muster up the courage to venture to her parent’s grave as it was too close to everything she had run away from.

She had busied herself with other thing as excuse for why she could not visit yet. She had returned exactly the way she had left, with just enough coin left to find lodging for the time being. With all of her excuses gone, she had finally made her way here… to the plains where her brother had buried their parents, on a hill just overlooking the village they had lived before disaster had met them in the face of war.

From what she could see, the village was doing much better than it had been when she left. Seven years was not a joke after all. She had thought the village would never recover, but it brought her joy to see how it had almost completely healed. She reached her parent’s gravestones and knelt, dropping the flower she had brought between them. The graves were better kept than she had expected… it seemed Alastair did not neglect them. Then again, it was not like him to do so. He had dug their father’s with the shaky arms of an adolescent boy, determined to not leave his father’s body to rot out in the open even as they tried to escape enemy soldiers under the cover of night. Only a few years later he had dug their mother’s place beside it with stronger arms and a stronger heat, wanting her resting place to be beside the man she loved.

She lowered her head in respect to greet her parents wistfully. Neither had lived long enough to see her become a woman, but she was sure they would never have expected she would leave home as she did.

“Maither, Faither, yer unworthy daughter has returned.” After leaving without any plans to return, she had not expected that her parents would forgive her wherever they were… so the first thing she did was apologize and make amends now that she had. It was the first step for her truly being home. She had just mustered the courage to meet the dead, now all she had to do was be brave enough to see the living.

She had just been thinking this when a shout from behind startled her and caused her to jump, as much from shock as guilt.

“Devona?!” The voice was different now… it sounded older and more mature… but Devona would recognize that voice anywhere… it was her brother. Her heart was beating loudly in her chest as she tried to decide between turning around and running away. She was not sure she was ready to meet him yet. Would he forgive her? She could still see the pain in his expression as she mercilessly said goodbye, telling him she would never return.

“Why? Why Devona, what is pushin’ ye to dae this? Ye are the only family I have left, are ye goin’ to leave me all alone?”

Her response back then was that she was too heartbroken to stay. He had looked at her as though he could not believe that she was abandoning him for something as selfish as that. In the seven years she was gone, she always wondered if he would forgive her. Now, she was about to find out, regardless of if she was ready or not. It was funny how fate worked. She put off visiting her parents because she was not ready, and it ended up causing her to meet her brother regardless of if she was ready or not. Still, this was better than meeting him.

“Devona… it is ye, is it nae?” the voice asked again, quieter now as he was right behind her. Taking a deep breath, she turned around to face him, a pained smile on her face.

“Aye brother… I have returned,” she said. Tears stung the corner of her eyes as she waited apprehensively for his response, but it was all for nothing as immediately she confirmed it, Alastair pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly even as she broke down in tears. Oh, she had missed him so. More than she thought she had, in fact.

“Devona… I can nae believe it… ye have truly returned… I thought I would never see ye again,” he said tearfully, his voice choked with emotion, letting her know just how much he had missed her and how happy he was at her return.

His arms were familiar yet foreign at the same time… when had he gotten so big? He was like a bear now, with years of training and adulthood resulting in thick muscles. Also, was that a beard? He was nothing like the young man she knew when she left… he looked so similar to their father that she almost gasped. Seeing Alastair, she could not help but wonder what he looked like…

Movement caught her eye from behind her brother, and she pulled away from him to look. A beautiful, auburn-haired woman stood behind them, watching with curious green eyes. In her arms, she held a child that was the spitting image of her despite having Alastair’s brown hair, and on either side of her skirts stood twins who looked like her brother had duplicated himself to produce them apart from the fact that the girl had the woman’s hair. That was… her brother’s family.

Tears welled up in her eyes again involuntarily as all four people stared at her with the curiosity of meeting a stranger. How much had she missed? She had missed everything. Seeing where she was looking, Alastair moved to introduce them. He put his arm around the woman and lifted one of the twins.

“This is me wife, Jane, and me children, Ramsey and Marie, and the baby, Ivie,” he said, every bit the proud family man. “And this is me sister, Devona,” he said, introducing her.

His wife seemed friendly as she smiled and leaned in for a hug which Devona awkwardly received, feeling shy.

“It is great to meet you, sister-in-law. Alastair’s told me all about you,” his wife said.

Devona was surprised to hear an English accent from her. After watching their father be killed by English soldiers, her brother had developed a grudging distaste for the English, but now he had married one. She was surprised enough by this that she missed the timing to respond naturally to Jane’s greeting. Realizing a second too late that her surprised silence had come off as rude, she scrambled to respond.

“Ah, I am so sorry, it is great to meet ye as well,” she spluttered, her face reddening slightly. It was so awkward, she wished she had come another day. She felt so strange, like she had been inserted somewhere she did not fit. It was only seven years, how had things changed so much? Would he have changed too? He was probably married by now with other children from another woman. She did not come back with the hopes to rekindle what they had, but she still wanted to see him again.

Where has the unbreakable Madame Devona Louis, who could stare down a group of rowdy soldiers until they were forced to regain some semblance of orderliness, gone? Where is the bravery that allowed her to ride the vast seas twice, not worrying for the terrible storms and whims of the waves? Her brother and his family were by no means as daunting as the things she had faced before, so why was her tongue heavy and her head bowed?

She was not someone who was awkward and jittery like this, it seemed she was more affected by her return than she had thought. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she took a step back and allowed herself to be more natural.

“I am sorry… I am quite overwhelmed by how much me brother has changed and meetin’ his family, so I was nae able to greet ye properly. It truly is nice to meet ye, sister-in-law,” she said, much more smoothly this time.

Jane gave her an understanding smile.

“That is quite alright,” she said, before nodding the twins who stared at her with curious brown eyes towards her. “Ramsey, Marie, meet your aunt.”

Taking the cue, Devona squatted down to the children’s height and gave them her friendliest smile.

“It is good to meet ye! I am yer Aunt Devona,” she said. The twins waved at her from beside their mother.

“I am Ramsey…” the boy said.
His sister joined in with, “I am Marie.”

Then they chorused, “Good to meet ye, Aunt Devona.”

The two were so adorable that Devona felt her heart squeeze. She reached out her arms and they came over to her, their curiosity not hidden in their gazes.

She was still playing with the adorable children when Alastair put a heavy hand on her shoulder.

“Ye should come with us Devona… where are ye stayin’? Me family and I live in the castle even ‘til now, ye should come back with me, it will be just like old times. Although, much has changed, I am the General now.” Her brother prattled on, not noticing at all that her expression had darkened since her back was to him. She forced a smile before she turned to face him, swallowing with some difficulty.

“Ah, that’s wonderful brother… I am so proud of ye… however could ye give me some time? I… I am nae ready yet to make an appearance in the clan. Perhaps a day… or two…?” she asked, hoping her voice did not come off too shaky. Alastair seemed confused and as though he wanted to say something more but his wife’s hand on his arm stopped him. Of course, he would be confused, he was probably wondering just what would make it so difficult to return with him immediately.

Devona looked away from her brother and turned her eyes to the horizon… Perhaps she was too hasty in her joy to be back home… it was more complicated than simply missing the plains.

Chapter 2

William left the meeting room feeling drained, but at least with his successful aversion of the topic to other matters, his headache has reduced to a manageable level. He reminded himself to see the castle healer for some soothing medicine later, he had indeed been working quite hard recently especially since Alastair who was like his right hand had taken some time off. He had a lot more to do by himself for the time being and he was not one to wait ‘til Alastair returned to get work done. The elders’ new fixation with his marriage however was the true reason for his stress.

Just when he thought that he had fully escaped, he saw his uncle waiting for him in the hallway to his study. He held back a groan and forced himself to continue walking towards him.

“Uncle,” he said in both acknowledgment and greeting. The older man pushed himself off the wall and joined him in walking.

“Ye dae nae look well… it seems ye have nae been sleepin’ properly. Dae ye nae think ye are headed in the wrong direction? I think ye should be headin’ to yer bedroom to get rid of those dark circles around yer eyes,” Robert Mackenzie said.
William scoffed lightly. “I believe ye should ken quite well the source of me stress uncle, perhaps I would nae look so tired if certain troublesome topics were avoided,” he quipped, trying to spare the old man the bite in his voice but failing rather miserably. His uncle only laughed regardless.

“Ye ken that I only dae everythin’ for yer good dear nephew, scoff as ye may, ye can nae deny that I and the elders are right,” he said. William let out an intelligible grumble but could not disagree. His uncle smiled, then as though remembering something important, snapped his fingers.

“Ah, and that nonsense ye did earlier… makin’ careless statements about the passin’ of the Lairdship. Dae nae dae that again. We are still undergoin’ the aftermath of a war with a usurper, dae ye nae care that yer careless words could light another flame?” Robert added, sounding truly upset with him this time.

William could not disagree and so he stayed quiet. Although he could bet on his life that Alastair would never try to betray him, he could not say the same about everyone on the council as one of them could get nasty ideas such as if Alastair could become Laird, they would rather do it themselves. Even when he said it, he knew that it was not the best idea, but in his frustration he had wanted to rattle them somewhat.

“Aye… I willnae speak carelessly again, although I did mean it,” he said, causing his uncle to glare at him. He avoided the old man’s gaze, causing him to sigh as though he gave up. He put a hand on William’s shoulder in a fatherly manner.

“Ye need to man up and dae what is necessary for the clan me nephew. I dae nae want to challenge yer authority but ye ken me duty is to dae what is best for the clan. It should be the same for ye as well. I ken ye can dae it,” his uncle said encouragingly then added as he walked away, “I truly think ye should take a break by the way. Get some rest, ye won’t be findin’ a bride lookin’ like ye carry the weight of the world on yer shoulders.”

William stopped in the middle of the hallway with his face raised to the ceiling. With the conversation, his previously waning headache was returning with a vengeance. His uncle was right about one thing, he needed a break. Changing his mind, he decided not to return to his study after all, instead heading down to the stables to find his horse and take some time off hunting to clear his head.

As he prepared his bow and arrow, he could not help but feel the phantom ache in his knee where he had been shot with an arrow during the previous war. He was fine, but there were days when he still felt the pain such as rainy days or during winter, and whenever he picked up his bow it came back to him as though the memory was what sparked the pain. He sighed, putting the bow in its place along with his arrows. If Alastair were around, he would have followed him simply because he did not think he should make a habit of going long distances and on potentially dangerous expeditions alone. Regardless of Alastair’s warning ringing in his head, there was no one else he trusted as much as Alastair who he would want to accompany him while he was looking for reprise.

The guards bowed as he passed by them at the gate, and he nodded at them in acknowledgment before riding off. The act of riding alone, with the wind in his hair as he pushed his trusty horse Noir to faster speeds, was already calming him down. His blond locks fluttered in and out of his vision and he made a mental note to trim it as it was beginning to get too long. He also had not shaved his face so he had a somewhat scruffy shadow of a beard. It made him look older somewhat. He had not been paying attention to his appearance recently, so his uncle was most likely right, with how stressed he was looking and the beard that accentuated his age, the young ladies would be hesitant to entertain any advances he might try to offer.

He had unconsciously given up after his failed engagement, so it was not as though he cared, but it seemed he should have put a bit more thought into it. From the meeting, it was clear that the Elders were ready to replace him without much ado. He wondered if he should begin preparing for the eventuality that he would no longer be the Laird. If his uncle and the other Elders chose to fulfill their ultimatum, would he fight?

Lachlan… How would he do as a Laird?

There was no real way for William to judge since he did not know his cousin, so he decided that he would try to make time and get to know him again since it had been so long. Since he returned, they had not spoken once save for the formal greeting Lachlan gave him when he came back. Although he would want Alastair to take over from him if it came to it, he had to be realistic. Although his uncle was not against him, if he brought Alastair as his replacement carelessly, his uncle would fight him. He would do it if only just to unify the elders against a common goal and prevent the council from breaking up into factions and an internal struggle for power.

In truth, with the way things were, he was more likely to cave and do as they wished, finding a woman who could give him an heir even if he divorced her afterwards. He would make a contract marriage if it came down to it. Since he could not do that to a young woman, he would probably need to ask his uncle to limit the bride search to widows instead. All she needed was to be able to bear his child. They could go their separate ways after that, and she would be properly compensated. He did not find the idea appealing in any way whatsoever since he was of the opinion that marriage was sacred and should be bound by love. However, since he was pushed to the wall, it did not seem like he had much of a choice.

He sighed as he entered the forest. The breeze was gentler as it swayed the branches of the trees high above his head. He tied Noir to a tree and continued on foot, nimbly picking through the forest in search of prey. He found one pretty quickly in a buck, which spotted him the exact same time as he spotted him. It reacted instantly, bouncing off and escaping him. William took off after it with his heart pounding in excitement.

Despite how popular hunting was as a sport, it was not always William’s favorite past time, there was a time when he had preferred to study, finding books and knowledge fascinating. As he chased down the deer with his arrow nocked, he could not stop his heart from pounding with the thrill of the chase. He had taken to hunting because of how it revolved around capturing his target. More than the popular reason of the kill or the pride from taking down a difficult animal, for him it was the small gratification that came from catching what was running from him.
He had already lost what he truly wanted to keep however, so it was fleeting gratification. The deer was fast, not to mention smart. Somehow, it had managed to escape him. A breaking twig from the bushes up ahead caught his attention.

Heh, perhaps the deer is not so smart after all.

He shot his arrow with lightning fast, although with the intention to startle. However instead of a spritely deer What came from the bushes was a woman’s terrified scream.

Completely thrown off, William froze for a second before jumping into action, separating the bush as he lurched forwards. He found his arrow thankfully stuck in the ground and not in the body of the woman who seemed to have fallen over from shock and was now sitting with her arms over her head. The arrow was dangerously close to her however, having pierced through the hem of her dress and burying into the ground. William felt guilt bubble up in his chest. He pulled the arrow out and put it back in his quiver.

“I am so sorry, are ye alright?” he asked, noting from her basket that she was picking berries and mushrooms. He cocked his head to the side, wondering if there were any women from the nearby villages and castle town who would come so deep into the forest to gather. He was still thinking this when she lifted her face to look at him, her expression full of shock. In a matter of seconds, William was mirroring her expression. He took a hesitant step forward, wondering if he was seeing an apparition because there was no way his first and only love who had vanished all those years ago was sitting on the ground in front of him.

“Devona… Devona, is that ye?” he asked, his voice shaky with disbelief followed by a horde of other emotions. She flinched in response, looking just as choked up with emotions as he was, except shame was riding her own horde.

“William…” she croaked quietly as she found her way to her feet on shaky knees. William’s vision blurred for a moment with tears, but he blinked them away quickly because he was scared that if he lost sight of her, she would disappear with the wind. Was she real? He needed to find out. He reached out and his fingers did not grasp air. Her arm was firm in his touch, proof that she was there… still this was not enough.

Spurred on by his emotions, he jerked her forwards into an embrace and covered her lips with his, kissing her like his life depended on it, to prove that he was not dreaming. She responded to his kiss, the years melting between them as he entwined his fingers with hers and buried his other hand in her hair. The pain, loneliness, anger, and love that refused to die poured out from them into their kiss, making it desperate, bittersweet. Tears streamed down both their faces as their tongues continued to search each other’s mouths, as though trying to remember all they had forgotten.

Finally, they broke their kiss, breathing heavily with tears marking their faces as they stood, foreheads pressed together. William did not know if he was happy or angry… a plethora of questions were fighting to come out of his mouth, but they were too many for him to choose from. Instead, the one question that encompassed everything came out first.

“Why…?” he asked. It meant a lot of things… Why did you leave me? Why for so long? Why did you break my heart? Why have you just returned? Even though he had only said one word it felt as though she understood all that he meant to ask as he stared into her sad brown eyes with his blue ones. He brought both hands to caress her face, kissing her once again, harder this time, his anger and frustration pouring through as he bit her lip before breaking their kiss again. She did not resist or complain at all, only staring at him with a depth of regret in her gaze that only roused his frustration the more.

Since she seemed unable to bring herself to answer his question, he asked one that would be simpler.

“Where did ye go?” he asked, his voice a low growl despite himself. She looked away, once again seeming ashamed, but he did not let her off that easily, pulling her gaze back to his again. God, were her lips always so plump or was it because he had bit her? With her face angled upwards with his finger, he could look at her properly. Her brown eyes that always lit a fire inside of him was still the same although they were sadder now. She had aged, but only enough for her girly features to melt into the sharp femininity of a mature woman. Her slender neck was pale, so pale and smooth, he wanted to plant his lips there and mark her.

Once again, she was not resisting, only looking at him exactly the way he was looking at her, accessing, burning into each other’s minds the changes as well as the similarities that remained over the years. His other hand slid up her side and he noted that she was slimmer than she had been the last time he saw her, looking more like an English woman than a Highlander. Was that normal? She did not look unhealthy, but he could tell that she had missed quite a few meals recently unless for some reason she had purposely lost weight. Her dress was well made, but seemed old, older than acceptable as the colors had faded. What had she been doing all this while? Was she alright?

She had still not responded so he tried again. “Well?” he asked.

“I was in France…” she said in a subdued voice. “I have lived there all this time.”

“When did ye return?” he asked next. If she had been on a ship to return, it made sense that she seemed so lean, perhaps she did not have enough to eat on the ship. Voyages were difficult, after all.

“I returned a few days ago,” she confessed and tried to look away again. Of course, he was not having that in the slightest, keeping his hand on her jaw so she was forced to look at him.

“And ye did nae think to find me first?” he asked. This seemed to be her breaking point as she finally resisted him, breaking away from his grasp and lowering her head.

“I am nae the same as back then William… We are nae the same. I couldnae… there was nay way I could just come to ye like that,” she said.

William frowned, what kind of excuse was that? Or was he just seeing it as an excuse because he had been pining for her all those years? She picked up her basket, and he realized with a jolt that she was going to leave again.

“I have to go… it has gotten to late… I have… I have someone to take care of,” she said, turning to leave. William stood there, staring at her back in shock when she turned back to glance at him again.

“I am glad to see that ye have been alright,” she said, and then took off running. William felt his jaw drop in both disbelief and annoyance. Alright, she said? Alright?!

“Bullshit!” he spat, swearing for the first time in a while. What did she think? That he would stand there and watch her leave him again? Well, she certainly had another thing coming!

If you liked the preview, you can get the whole book here